Nathan'ette Burdine's The Nyle Magazine
Hi!



  News     Politics       Entertainment      Under the Radar      Double-Talking            

 News Archive 2020








The haunted house that McLain Companies was giving away for free has a new owner
by Nathan'ette Burdine: May 21, 2020
 


The folks over at McLain Companies reeled in a buyer who agreed to take a haunted house in Lafayette, Louisiana, off their hands. Sylvia McLain, who is the co-owner of McLain Homes, told folks that they can have the haunted house for free if they agree to pay for the move of the house away from its current location.

Somebody heard about it and was like, “Hmm, get the house for free and just pay for the move. That’s a good deal there, a real good deal! I’ll take it!” And “take it,” he or she did.

On May 6, 2020, at 8:21AM, Sylvia McLain posted this message on her Facebook page, “We will no longer be responding to inquiries or messages about the home being given away. It has been claimed and will be moved to a new location very shortly.”

The name of the new owner has not been disclosed. But, I’m sure they’ll reveal that at a later date when he or she gets all settle in and is then ready to say, “Hey, I got a haunted house for free that I had to pay to move!”

The folks over at WBRZ2 say that Dawn Vallot DeClouet’s grandparents, Joe and Lula Vallot, built the house back during the late 20s and early 30s and that her 90-year-old great-grandmother, Adele, is the ghost occupant living in the house.

It’s piquing your interest, isn’t it?! Here’s a family house that has a nonagenarian ghost living in it. Just thinking about all the fun things you can do with a 90-year-old ghost has got you grinning from ear to ear.

You can do things like teach her how to take pictures on an iPhone, show her how to tweet, let her take part in Zoom meetings, and show her how to work the remote so she can look at 1922 on Netflix.

You and nonagenarian granny will have some good days in that house. The only problem is those good days won’t last too long once you stop and look at the fact that your new home looks every bit of the 20s and 30s time periods that it was built during.

The white vinyl is dirty looking. There’s a lot of yellow and green stains on the house with splashes of a doo-doo brown color around it. And the house is sitting on bricks.

Haunted House given away for free by McLain Companies;

I don’t know about y’all, but…this is 2020, and I ain’t about to put my money in any house that’s sitting on bricks. We sit our houses on foundations around here! A house sitting on bricks ain’t nothing but a sign of a lot of other problems that many folks ain’t trying to solve.

Now, I know what some of y’all are saying, “The house was built back in the 20s! And it’s possible it has a lot of potential, which the new owner sees.”

Yeah, but that ol’ saying of, “Don’t let your heart trick your mind into telling your eyes that you see something that isn’t there,” is also true.

That house is so nasty looking that it looks like it was physically abused. I mean, you’d think the previous owners were allergic to soap, water, bleach, Pine-sol, and Formula 409. That house ain’t going to be nothing but a headache for whoever has bought it, I tell you the truth right now. Not only will the person have to pay what some folks say is $80,000 for the move, which is what I think the folks over at McLain Companies wanted to sell the house for, but the new owner will also have to pay for all of those incidentals that happen. Y’all know, incidentals like mold, rotten wood, floors coming up, asbestos, peeling paint, and bad pipes.

Mind you, folks, those are incidentals the new owner will have to pay for if the house doesn’t fall apart during that $80,000 move the McLain Companies’ folks have “Shanghai Noon” some poor soul into paying for. Because if the house so happens to fall apart during the move, then the new owner will have that cost plus the $80,000 move to pay for. And when you run all of that together, that bill will run up to be well over $100,000. To tell you the truth, anyway you look at it, the new owner will end up paying well over $100,000 for the house.

And I know y’all noticed that I didn’t say anything about the house being haunted because that ain’t the problem. As a matter of fact, there are several haunted houses, like Myrtles Plantation and Oak Alley Plantation, in Louisiana with ghost occupants that help to bring in a hefty income.

Nonagenarian granny, however, ain’t bringing in any income. Nonagenarian granny be like, “My state of being won’t let me do that.” Just to be fair, nonagenarian granny may be turned off by the fact that she’s had to deal with a lot of dirty living people while she was alive and dead. Therefore, contributing, in any way, is just something nonagenarian granny ain’t gonna do.

As for the ghost occupants of Myrtles Plantation and Oak Alley Plantation, they wouldn’t be doing their part by helping to contribute to the daily pot if those houses looked like they were built in another century; which is how the haunted house looks that McLain Homes just sold to some poor soul.

So, if you want a haunted house or a regular house to sell, then you need to fix it up. Or else, you’re going to find yourself, just like the poor soul who just bought that house from McLain Companies, fixed up, the wrong kind of way, right up a creek without a paddle.






comments powered by Disqus